Welcome to the Mindset Coach Academy podcast. I'm lindsey Wilson, and I am a high-performance mindset coach, a mom, a former professional athlete, and an entrepreneur. I help coaches and high performers optimize their mindset to improve their coaching, their performance, and those of their athletes, and their lives. Here you'll learn all about mindset, how to live it, how to teach it, and how to sell it.
Hi everybody, and welcome back to the Mindset Coach Academy podcast. Of course, my name is Lindsey Wilson, and today we have a very special guest of the Bodacious Brotherhood from our last MCA class. We ended up having a group of men. We don't necessarily secrecate that way normally, but it ended up being this group of men in our small breakout groups. We're going to talk today about their experience in the MCA, in particular the small groups, which is usually one of people's favorite part of the MCA.
Really the magic that they created with their captain, Ken, we're going to do a little round robin, and really talk about their experience. In particular, the topic, as a woman, I get to say this, is male vulnerability. I think as a wife, I'm always like, where is my husband going to get some male vulnerability?
All you women listening, this isn't just for the guys, but you guys created a really special thing. I'll joke aside. I just kind of selfishly want to pick your brain and see how you did it, and just learn a little bit. So with that, we're going to do a round robin. We got John Austin, Brandon Stokes, Ken, Jeff, you guys.
I want to hear from you guys just a little spiel about who you are, and obviously you're a certified coach, and maybe where you're taking mindset coaching right now. And then let's get into it if that's okay. John Austin, do you want to start us off?
Speaker 4: Of course. Yeah. So my name is John Austin Emmons. I'm from San Antonio, Texas. I'm an ex-athlete myself, and really my aim is to bring the services to baseball athletes that I desperately wish I had when I was playing. So obviously baseball is a very mental game. There's a lot of time between pitches. And so my job is to help the guys that love to play the game, play it as long as they can through the power of mental performance.
Speaker 3: And you're also a professional baseball player, but that's not a big deal. So we'll just make sure we get that in there. All right, Brandon, tell us a little bit about yourself.
Speaker 5: Hi there, Brandon Stokes, living Orlando, Florida. Mental performance coach and a proud graduate of the MCA Academy. It's been awesome. Really helped change my life and impact my family as well. And hopefully now all the students and families that I work with. And so I work with a lot of young athletes and their families really just to help them achieve what they want to do, right?
Put their vision into action, not just dreams because they're from the outside, but the vision from the inside and really get after it and help them through the inevitable ups and downs of the athletic way of life. Yeah.
Speaker 3: And Brandon, you were a mindset coach actually long before you were a graduate of our program. And so I think you have a little bit of a different perspective in that sense of like you came in having kind of done this already. So maybe we'll get into that a little bit later, but
Speaker 5: just that's the point of the small groups, right? Yeah, it was that was that that was the difference.
Speaker 3: That's the yeah, definitely. Totally. Jeff, let's go with you and then we'll finish off with Ken.
Speaker 1: Awesome. Sounds great. Jeff Stover here, based in Orange County, Southern California, been a human performance advocate for over 30 years, lover of sports and life. And that's got me into becoming a mental performance coach and utilizing all of the hooks and hangups that I have experienced as an athlete and in my life and share that and be an amazing listener to my athletes and recently graduated from the MCA.
Speaker 3: Yeah, cool. Awesome. And Ken.
Speaker 6: Ken, I'm still a competitor. I'm based in New Jersey. I'm the owner of Athletes Mental Trainer, a mental performance service helping athletes overcome mental blocks and reach peak performance.
Speaker 3: And Ken is so for those of you that don't know in our certification, we always have what we call captains certified coaches come back and they run the small groups.
So I'm not even in the small groups, which is why I'm sort of flying the wall today and like wanting to hear because you guys kept talking about your small group and how special it was. So but Ken was the one that ran all of that. So with that in mind, I would love and I know Brandon has to go parent in a little bit. His son has a big baseball game. So he has to go soon. So generally, I would start with Ken. But if you don't mind, Ken, I'm going to have Brandon go first so that he can go take his son to a baseball game and get him all mentally prepared.
I'm sure because parents kids love when their parents are their mental coach. Oh, my. We can't help you with that. But tell me a little bit about really, I keep saying magic, but like that's the vibe I got from you guys. Every guys you guys came to the big group, you guys would talk about your small group and you called it the Bodacious Brotherhood. Like tell me sort of how that evolved, Brandon.
Speaker 5: Yeah, we just, we came up with it. Because I mean, how do you, when you say the word bodacious, like you got a smile and you got to say like it's light and levity and it gets enthusiastic.
All right. Like you're not going to cut somebody out with bodacious. So like, you know, and then it was just going to happen to be all men. So it's like a bodacious brotherhood. Like we got to speak what we want to, what we want to manifest.
It was a four month commitment of the unknown. And you know, what we ask our athletes to do with us and the families that join us, like this, we got to walk the walk. And so Ken, from the very beginning, one of the first things Ken introduced us that I wrote down was about our belief in ourselves and the, and the ability we have to impact the world.
And it, to this day, I still reflect on it, have it written on a white board. So we started with belief. And then we, when we, and he encouraged us to put our voices out there, like instead of always talking about what we read or from someone else or what we watch with someone else, like what, like really start sharing our own voices within the group. So then we can really start making more of an impact outside.
So Ken really set the tone that way. And then in terms of vulnerability and the group really starting to, like we really start to lean on one another, but it just so happened. I think around the second week, maybe I had a purse, our family's been going through some things with my father-in-law being diagnosed with brain cancer. And right before a call we had, we got another bad report from the doctors, just a report, right?
It is what it is. And I just, when I, when I zoomed in, man, and they asked me how I was doing, I just lost my stuff. And so the boys were there for me, like, and it's, it was just as hard, like it's so hard to talk about, because it's so visceral. I mean, so there was just that outpouring of grief, but also knowing that those guys were there for me, and they all just like, like everybody was listening. And it wasn't like, whoa, is me, that everybody just listened. And then Kenny Meenily as the captain brought us back into using a mental tool that, that Lindsey, you've been teaching for 20 years, which is braver.
And man, like we zoned in on braver. And that just like, I mean, I got goosebumps right now telling the story. And it just like, and I get, at that moment, I was all in for all these boys because like another theme that made, that created that magic, Lindsey, for us is that none of us wanted to disappoint the other one. Like we want to do our work. We want to make sure we're doing our daily beast. We want to do, we want to show up for one another and, and be there for each other at Tuesday when that call came. And so we did, we made ourselves available emotionally, physically, and that allowed us in to learn from, we all brought up different experiences. And we all, we all leaned into one other, but like another thing that our captain made sure that we did was not to make this process about us, but to get out of our own heads and get out of our own way, and make it about each other in those small groups. But also then to that, the, the idea is to practice and we make sure we're making it about our students and our clients that we have in their families.
Because it's too often we can nerd out and get in our own head and into like, intellectualize our concepts. I am struck. I can do that.
I can do that. We make it too much about ourselves right here. I make it right. I'm making everything about everybody.
Really, it's my crap. So like, you know, like, hey, man, can make sure our focus is on helping our athletes as best we can. We took it in a way that we owned our identity and we didn't abuse it and we, and we did it to support one another and take ownership of it and challenges. You know, we spoke so often about being better fathers, better husbands and better friends. Like, and that's, that was always the theme. It was always about enriching other people's lives and starting, and starting in our house on the way and then working from the inside out.
And that to me sums up why the Bodacious Brotherhood continues to meet and talk privately and organize groups. I can't, we still had, we still had another call after the graduation ceremony. It's like, we all still hooked up the next Tuesday and it is just, it's transformative.
Speaker 3: I love it. I like, it makes, so the small groups have always been really special. I know Ken can attest to that. Like, there's just a magic to it. And, and, but I also know that like the ripple effect, as you said, that after the certification, like the amount of goodness you guys are going to put out into the world gets magnified with the support that you have from each other. But I'm so curious, like, how does one find that? Like, how does that show up in a group of dudes that are supposed to be like talking about, I don't know, your careers and all your accomplishments and making money and like slaying it? Like, how does that become the vibe? You know what I mean? And I know, Brandon, you can go get off whenever we'll miss you, but I totally get it. So tell me how that becomes the vibe. Like, how does one do that? Ken, do you want to start? I don't know. Where do we start? I don't, I don't get it. I tell me everything.
Speaker 4: I think Lindsey just starts with the, I mean, the values that all four of us kind of share. And that is right to, to be an example first in our own home and to do things right, not for what that can do for us. But, you know, how do we show up for the benefit of others? And I think collectively early on, we all kind of felt that from each other that it was, it was, we were here for something, obviously, in a selfish reason for our business, but it was so much deeper and so much, there was so much more depth to it than that. And I think first, right, it, like Brandon said, it was about, you know, being better fathers, being better leaders in our community, showing up better as, you know, husbands and so on and so forth. So I think that's as like, what was the spark and where does that start? I think we early on, we all collectively saw that in each other.
Speaker 3: And I, before Brandon goes, I do want to call out to like, I remember specifically in the big group, like I knew you guys had a really special bond because you guys would start calling each other out in the bigger group.
And you would start like calling each other on bullshit or calling each other on like playing small or like, and I think that that's like such a great example of just coaching in general, like creating that vulnerability, creating that trust, creating that space where you could also have the car conversations. Was that your experience as well?
Speaker 5: A hundred percent. I mean, I, I remember a couple instances, Ken specifically would poke, he would poke me to make sure I was, I was come from a, look at it with a different lens, right? Well, I was looking at a situation, either myself or looking at a different situation. So he challenged me to have a fresh perspective on, and I watched him do with the other guys. But the way we did it with one another was not to attack and not to like get us to shut down, but to really be like, Hey, like lean into that and see how you can grow. Cause then like, you're making a difference in other people's lives. And so it was, it was unique because I've been a part of businesses in the past where you would call out people on different identity politics issues.
And you would just like, ha, I got, I got them. I called them out and people would shut down and became unhealthy. But our group, like when we challenged each other, it strengthened, it gets strengthened. It's not, now the growth, like I didn't always like it. Like we talked about that as well in a group.
Like it wasn't always, it didn't always, you know, but that was the whole point. Like how do we, how can we help each, how can we help our athletes who are younger than us a lot of times, like to grow and trust us if, if we're not willing to walk that. And it's like, we got to really be uncomfortable and really, and that's where the growth is at.
Speaker 3: And so we just, So give me some specific examples. Like what, what was the plate? Like give me specific examples for many of you guys of where you guys push each other.
Speaker 5: I know. I mean, I'll go real quick again is, I was, I had a situation where I met somebody. I was at a baseball event. They were there for a different event. She approached me because I had my, my, my, my business rep on, on my shirt and she approached me to talk about things and I just totally froze and didn't lean into it all. And I knew I missed that opportunity, but, and it wasn't, and I was kind of coming out like, Hey, I missed an opportunity.
Whoa, whoa, whoa. And then like, no, but like, Ken, and even Liz, you helped with it later on on the big group call, like we did in the big group as well. Cause it was just like, lay it out there, like, like lay out your open wound. You were like, no, here's the work you got to do on yourself. And so you got, I was told me like, look man, you're overthinking this.
And plus, and then like, again, it was a classic example that Ken should make. No, man, you were too much in your own head thinking about you instead of listening to them, identify what their problem is. And then we say, Hey, you know what, we can offer a solution. And so that was the big thing that, Hey man, get out of your own way and really focus on them.
Speaker 6: Yeah, there was, there was trying to create this perfect response about who I am as a mental coach, you know, the advertising of it. Exactly. And it was, no, just listen, because you've been doing this for years, you know how to respond. Just listen to the emotion, listen to the problem, and just respond the way that you would respond naturally. There you go.
Speaker 4: It seemed like everybody in the group was able to see something in each other that sometimes, right, we, we just fail to see in ourselves. Right. And I think to that point of what Brandon just said is we all look at the other three and be like, and we just edify and have so many examples of these things that they've done and, you know, the unique qualifications of who they are and, and why it's deserving to kind of go out into the world and do great things. But we had a hard time, I think sometimes seeing that in ourselves, but everybody was able to pull these different things and kind of put on display your greatest hits, if you will, to kind of remind us all of who we really were and how we, you know, we had the ability to go out and create great impact.
Speaker 3: So you're saying we, but I remember specifically, John Austin, like you having like a very, I don't remember which week it was, but I think it was based on your small group work. Yeah. There was like a big shift for you. Do you remember that?
Speaker 4: I do. And I remember getting off that Tuesday and like I still get emotional too. And I'm an emotional guy, right? And I got off that call and kind of just had a desk and just thought, and I mean, I cried for 10 or 15 minutes, but the good stuff, right? It was like one of those like letting it all go, like, and, and, right, all the self-limiting beliefs that I had kind of packed on my back over the years.
And, you know, it's like, we forget all the really great things we do and we take our losses and we just magnify them. But I remember on the big call as well, I mean, there was, there was one call that I felt like was, it was like a personal counseling session just for myself. And that moment on for me has, again, I think I said to you afterwards, Lindsey, if I got nothing else out of the four months and just that one call, it would have been, you know, 10 X worth the price of admission for me. Yeah.
Speaker 3: But what I remember from that was it was your bodacious brotherhood that called you out and was like, you're playing here and you can play. I think Brandon said something.
Speaker 4: No, I remember. I think Ken and Jeff backed him up too. But like, I remember that call like very specifically because, you know, we're all on zoom and everything, but you can, you can sense people's energy shifts still. And that was, it seemed like from my perspective that that was a big shift for you.
No, and it absolutely was. And it was, I remember, I would always say like, well, I just did this and like, well, I only got this far and, you know, come on.
Speaker 5: Like, like, like, you're not an ex athlete, dude, you're still like, you're a goat, man. You're still an athlete, man. Like we're all still athletes. And you're like, come on, brother, like let's go. Yeah. Oh, man. I remember.
Speaker 4: Stinkfully.
Speaker 3: Yeah. Absolutely. Awesome. All right, Jeff, what do you hear from you? What was your experience?
Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, I've been contemplating everything that's been said. And I couldn't agree more with everything that has been said. I immediately think of iron sharpens iron. And when you have character and each one of us had character, we're going to be the same no matter what the circumstances. When we found that out when, you know, week one, week two, there's that trust factor.
And then when Brandon, when Brandon brought that hardship to the table week two, I mean, that was 18 to 20 weeks ago. And you can see how, you know, still that is impactful, right? And, you know, hardships create trust as well. So there was extreme accountability, extreme trust. And I like to call it the like the press on or be bold mentality. And that's what created this that ripple effect and that momentum that I think we still each one of us have today. Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 5: Hey, Lindsey. Hey, Lindsey, I'm going to I'm going to get going real quick, but hopefully there's a nice smooth transition. Number one, you're awesome. You've always been an inspiration to me. And I admire you like so you're like your salacious sisterhood, right? With us bodacious brothers, my brothers.
I love you. I keep rooting for your brother. So can't wait for us all to reconnect together. And I'll see you later. For sure. Good luck in the game later.
Speaker 4: Thank you. Talk soon, Brandon.
Speaker 3: Okay, Ken, I want to hear about how you sort of what did you do? I mean, you've been a captain many times. And I know each time you're getting better and everybody talks about how wonderful your groups are like this one in particular, did you how did you set the stage or is it just sort of you? How did that work?
Speaker 6: It was surreal. I mean, the total strangers came together on a phone call as Brandon said, you know, like call number one, there was just this or something that was bigger than all of us that we just felt. And and I just took that. And I ran with it. I just went with intuition. I went with like what these guys were bringing the the energy. You know, we talked we hit it off right from the start, we talked about sports and business, you know, family values. You know, the main thing here was, you know, we're men working to make a difference in this world with working with young athletes developing character and integrity and leadership and confidence.
All the things that we wish we had had right some mentor and guide us. And so just from the beginning, it just became really organic and continued to grow. And then again, by the second week, I think, as Jeff said, there was this just trust that we could all become vulnerable and accountable to one another, just sharing struggles, a brand dimension, you know, like just what was going on with his dad. And and that just drove us that just drove us and it just somehow pulled us together. And I was just going with it. I was just feeding off their energy and just again, when they would play small, I'd be like, come on, man, you know, look beyond that, right? What's our mission here?
And then we would regroup. I can say that, you know, I've done I've done this for years. But There's a genuine love and admiration for these guys. It's just, yeah, the chemistry, the thing that happened here, the magic that happened, unbelievable.
Speaker 3: I'm so curious though, like the male part of it. Like the idea, like where are you getting this if you're finding this in other parts of your life? And the fact that it wasn't, we didn't intend for that to happen, but it happened. Like I know for me, like being in a women's group, there's a benefit to being with all women and there's a benefit for a mix. Like how did that sort of play into a safe space for you guys with this? I don't know if that's quite a question, but I'm just kind of like exploring that idea.
Speaker 4: Brandon mentioned his call with his father or his father-in-law early on. And I think you talk about being vulnerable after that. It was like everybody's guard came down because I think we all witnessed how we supported him in that moment.
And then if we can be vulnerable in, it's a grown man, I mean, shedding tears, right? On a call with, at that point, strangers in the way that I think we reacted to that. And we like opened up our arms and we embraced that. We didn't push back on that. We leaned into it. We listened, we listened empathetically. We said, what can we do to help?
I think from that moment on, it became very easy to say, hey, this is a group of people, a group of guys, men, that they got my back. I can share things. I can kind of let my guard down.
I can be who I am. Because again, I think we all saw how we supported Brandon in a terribly trying moment for him. So that really set the groundwork to be like, hey, there's all bets off, what do we got? Bring it here, collectively, how do we use that moment to continue to be vulnerable? Through other aspects of our life. Yeah.
Speaker 6: Yeah, Jay, you're spot on. I mean, that was the thing. Because it was interesting because each one of us then just stepped right in after the other one was having a conversation with Brandon. And I could just see it. I could feel it. I mean, you guys all, you experienced it. It was, yeah. That was when the moment happened.
Speaker 3: And then throughout the next, let's see, that was another three and a half months where there are specific times, you guys kind of laid the foundation of that vulnerability, which makes sense, right? Like somebody kind of has to go first to create that safety, right?
Everybody gets that evidence that it's okay. Where there are specific times, whether that was like, I don't know, going and getting your first client or the fear of doing your first video or like anything, and obviously things outside of running your business, but were there specific moments that that group like really, especially in retrospect, like looking back and saying, that was that really helped me get over that hump. That would have been way harder without that group. Are there any specific examples that you might have?
Speaker 1: I can, I'll jump in. I can remember not coaching yet and Ken being very consistent and fair on basically saying, you just need to go out and coach. Just coach, right? And I remember J.A.
and Brandon also backing him up. And it was just this little night like, or like, you know, pushes that we all needed that created a compound effect in a positive way, right? So it was these little things over the time period that created massive results, I think for all of us and that relationship developing.
Speaker 6: Yeah, and Jeff, I remember distinctively when that we talked about this, it's a main theme. When we get to a certain point and you think we're not ready, okay? And I could see that you were living in that space if I'm not ready. And you just stepped up and started coaching. I forget, we all went through and J.A. was doing something and just out of nowhere, right? In your stealth mobile, you showed up and you just made this amazing coaching session.
Speaker 1: And it was like, holy crap. Like you just kicked ass in that moment. You know, it was amazing. And I think that's when you just realized that I've got this.
Speaker 3: Yeah. I'm also just curious, like do you guys have this in other aspects of your life? Like what is it? Like again, I'm just basing this off being a wife and a sister. Like I don't see the men in my life having a lot of, like maybe on teams, you guys all played on teams at one point, but even that, that's probably a lot of bravado, I would imagine.
What do you have an equivalent in your life of this kind of like male vulnerability? Or is this something new? Or is this something that, I don't know. I'm just kind of curious on how this is, if this is normal or not.
Speaker 4: I think, I mean, not to speak for everybody here, but I think there's very few probably men in my life that I have the ability to kind of just bear all and put it all out there and share everything. Vulnerability is fears, worries, and just really, like I said, just kind of bear it all. So no, I have, there's a very select few, I think people that I have outside of this group here that I feel like I can do that with in life. But I think too, that's something that a lot of us, I would say are probably desperately looking for, I think as men, it's hard to create that space in today's world. So no, it was unique in that regard for sure.
Speaker 6: And we've talked about that. We've talked about those vulnerabilities. And our role and responsibility is as men and how difficult it is. And I think, again, each week had some theme that was relevant to maybe what we were feeling or having gone through that week. And we were kind of like able to discuss that and explore that and really grow from one another.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and you're doing something really hard together, right? Like you were looking at yourself and like, especially month one, but even beyond when you're actually like going out into the world, there's something so bonding. I mean, that's why you're so close to your teammates, right? It's like you do so much hard shit together that you have to rely on each other. And there's nothing that bonds people faster than doing something hard together.
Speaker 6: Yeah, Lindsey, there's men's groups, right? Guys to get together and there's a lot of, like fakeness and machoism going in there. None of that. Service level. That was served, yeah. Right off the bat, we just went to that level and we stayed there.
Speaker 3: Well, it also makes me realize that the male, let's call intimacy of vulnerability that I see, I should say even the male time that I see people spending with, spending male spending time together, that's what I want to say. I see a lot of sports, sports watching and drinking. And, yeah. And I could be totally wrong. I'm just a wife over here, but. Yeah.
Speaker 4: Well, it makes it tough to connect. It makes it tough to create those connections to your point, if that's things that aren't values in your life, I can speak to that. Yeah.
Right, not being a big drinker, not being a big go to the, you know, go to the bar type guy, where do you create that connection? So, yeah. No, I think you're right. Those are the landscapes that, right? The world, if you will, kind of tells us that's where we go create connection. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah. If I could add, if I add something. Yeah, of course. Yeah, awesome. So, I may be an outlier in this sense, but I'm also a very persistent person. So, I've been leading a men's group for over a decade. And we meet, we try to meet on a bi-weekly basis. And then I also have been intentional to seek out a peak performance partner, which I've meet on a weekly basis to share with you. And I've met with a lot of other business as well as basically accountability partners for personal business life.
And those two things in addition to this group, where we went deep like Navy SEALs has been just, that's an awesome experience to be able to be a part of. Yeah.
Speaker 3: Good for you though, for creating that life.
Speaker 1: Thank you. It's an intentional thing though, like, right? You have to seek those intentions and be aligned with your values and your purpose. Or else we get off course and we get misaligned and then we're at the bar hanging out, you know, with our guy friends. Not that there's anything wrong with that. I've seen my fair share of bars and guy friends. So, it's all good.
Speaker 3: Yeah, no, it's funny you say that though, because I do have, like, my brother's a good example. He's like really been intentional about creating like really solid deep male friendships. But I do also, now that we're saying all this, like I do see that like, I don't know, it's like it almost takes more effort for males because it's like the path of least resistance is like drinking and watching sports. And like, if you are going to try to do something outside of that, it's not as natural.
It's not a societally accepted or, you know, like, I don't know women. It's like, yeah, you're going to go for a walk with your friends and you're going to talk about things. You know, that's like what we do. That's like an easy ask. So I do see it, but I do notice as you're saying that it, it maybe is potentially more effort because it's not as mainstream.
Speaker 6: Yeah, but this was, this was, and Jeff, now go.
Speaker 1: I was just going to say that's the difference between shallow conversations and very deep and meaningful conversations. Yeah. It's just you're going to get what you put into it. Totally.
Speaker 6: Yeah, we didn't come to talk baseball scores, right? Or pick J is knowledge of, you know, of baseball. This was, there's a bit, there's a higher purpose. Like we're here on a mission to do something special. So, so that's what really brought it together. Like we recognize that early on that this wasn't just, Hey, what about that game over the weekend?
Did you watch it? Like there was no small talk like that. That was, we were like right in, like Jeff said, like right in there diving in the Navy SEALs, getting into the tough stuff. Yeah.
Speaker 3: Well, I think early on you guys recognized how special the group was and how far you could get by what you could put into that group. I mean, that's a whole thing with, with vulnerability is like, you really want to know that it's going to pay off. Right. Like, you know, it's like, really, that's how our brains work, you know, and you could see early on that this was going to really help you in your pursuit of what you're doing and by doing that help you help other people. Yeah.
Speaker 6: And also Lindselindseyy, one of your principles that we've talked about many times is, you know, get what you came for. And that's what these guys did. Yeah. Right. They came to, to find growth in their lives. Yeah. They came to put on that challenge. Yeah.
Speaker 3: Well, I know for a fact, Ken, that you created like this, the safety that allowed that to happen because, you know, just making sure that everybody knew that they could say and do whatever. And that was a space, you know, that's what the small groups are for, right?
They're smaller than the big group. And the goal is for you guys to have that space to ask all your crazy questions and get all the support that you need. And so I know that you really work to create that.
Speaker 6: And I think that that then, as you mentioned earlier, when we talked about the larger groups, you know, where, where kind of, we were challenging each other in the larger groups, I think that set a good example again, to the larger group.
What's possible, right? Like, I think maybe people are taken back, but I think towards the end, they were starting to open up and they grew. And each one of us was just kind of helping others on the call experience what we experienced. And that was neat to watch as well.
Speaker 3: Well, I'm also interested in like how this affects you guys as coaches. I mean, you guys are all, whether you're a captain or not at some point, which you probably will be, but like for you, Ken, running, running the groups, you know, yourself and then John Austin, Jeff, like your sessions or small groups, like how experiencing like you basically set a new bar, right? Like that's how I think of it of like, how is this going to help you when you're in the leadership position or Ken, when you're in the leadership position next?
Speaker 4: I think for me, it speaks to the need to write the need to create connection, the need to create trust, the need to very early on say, hey, this is a space where, you know, I'm here to help you. I'm here, you know, to help you get whatever out of this that you need.
That's been the big thing for me is if I can create the kind of connection with my individual clients that we were able to do in this small group, like, I mean,
Speaker 3: you kidding, like the sky's the limit. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I agree. Yeah, sorry. I was just going to say that re communication and listening, listening, the best relationships. Yeah. Bottom one. Yeah. I think that's what I think each and every one of us want to do. Yeah. I'm sorry.
Speaker 3: Oh, I was just going to say, I think that idea though, that like when someone goes first and shows everybody that it's okay is like a really powerful concept. Because we both had that experience of being in a group and someone kind of takes it to another level of vulnerability and all of a sudden your brain's like, oh, okay, it's safe. I can cry in front of the group too and nothing happens.
The sun rises the next day, you know. But yeah, you guys definitely set a new standard for sure. All right. Well, I want to wrap it up here, but does anybody have any final thoughts on this topic? What would you say to, I don't know, a guy out there that's thinking about male vulnerability in the small groups or a woman listening.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I would say to counsel, have relationships and be open to taking things a little bit farther than, you know, you feel comfortable with. You know, we live in a comfort culture and the more discomfort we experience, we increase our window of tolerance and we are able to go farther than we originally thought. So just having that extra, that conversation, when you see someone and you feel that nudge of like, I should go talk to this person or I should see if they need help. That's what I would say. I love that.
Speaker 3: I think just lean in, lean into the relationships. I call relationships the currency of life. We never know when you're going to need to call on them, but I think it just lean in. You know, lean into the people around you, lean into, you know, friends and to just point, try to dig a little bit deeper. Break the surface, if you will. And maybe that means you go first. Maybe that means you share something first with those people in an effort to develop that deeper connection, that deeper meaning. Yeah. Yeah, cool. And what are your final thoughts?
Speaker 6: I think, lindsey, the small groups, right, if we kind of think about the, you know, how it all started and how it's grown, they were designed to provide the support for experimentation for stepping out of your comfort zone, right?
Taking all of what is in month one and being uncomfortable with it in a comfortable environment. Totally. We just happened to nail it. Right. It's about, again, challenging those limiting beliefs. And then, you know, having people listen to, I'm afraid of this or, you know, and then just provide that safety net that, that, you know, as, as, you know, Brandon said, you know, like, we were there with holding out our arms stretched, you know, hey, we're here to support you, man. You know, like, let it go. Yeah. And I think that's the, that's the, what's been how these, these small groups are transforming. Because that's, that's the growth that comes into the larger group. Yeah. Beautiful.
Speaker 3: And I love that you guys were supporting each other on so many levels, like being a mindset coach, obviously was one of them, but it was also being a good husband and good father and good person in the world and just the 360 of all that so I appreciate you each so much. Thank you for taking the time today.
Thank you for all the good work that you're doing out in the world and, and for sharing your story. I think this is a really a topic that I'm interested in. So I hope that other people are as well. And thank you for your vulnerability today. And again, for setting a new standard for our small groups. I appreciate each one of you can Jeff, John Austin and Brandon real quick. Where can they find out more about you guys? Maybe on Instagram. John Austin, Jeff and Ken, tell me.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm at men competitors.com and then online at on Instagram at men competitors as well. Okay. Jeff. You know, right now, right here.
Speaker 1: Soon to come on multiple socials.
Speaker 3: Well, we'll put in the show notes if you got it set up by the time we put this up. Stay tuned. All good. That's right. Good. All in the process.
Speaker 6: You can find me on athletes mental trainer website.com or social media athletes mental trainer as well. Perfect.
Speaker 3: All right, and we'll put Brandon's down in the show notes as well. All right, guys, everybody have a great day.
Speaker 1: Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you. Take care. See you.
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